Sometimes, when I’m editing these poems, I imagine I have one of those Sassy Gay Friends behind me saying what what what are you doing. For Reference if you have no idea what I’m talking about: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnvgq8STMGM haha
This is one of those poems. There are some major issues with connecting the idea of water and dry as well as the concepts of life and death via those conduites. It’s all jumbled up there like some sort of mush… and frankly, I wasn’t sure where to start.
So I wanted to talk to you about structure as it pertains to developing a theme. Poetry has that perfect ability to suprise and excite, but that course is often missed if a framework isn’t established in the beginning. Think of this as magnets for the words to favor… some north, some south… It’s another asset of the poem to keep an eye on.
This theme of wet and dry is a big deal in my poetry. I find myself coming again and again to fish and water and deserts, maybe because I grew up in Las Vegas. In this piece in particular, I attempted to suprise and excite with the idea of a water reversal… but failed miserably… this is because I did not associate water with anything positive in the begining to make the switch.
The best way to solve that is to go back and assess the position of each use of the word. Does this move the imagery towards or away from the final image. For this case the water is a force of death, Woolf being the allusion. (Going back to that idea of pulling the horse, I may need to pull a little harder for this connection to work, we’ll see.)
The first case, pooling summer, positive. The second case, dirty water, negative. and so on. Bending these associations to fit the trajectory I want for the final line is the main focus, though fixing as I go can also help reel in the poem. Control the space, control the langiage, control the polarization of the piece.
Always have control over your work. If you feel like the last little bit doesn’t pack the same kind of punch, visit the earlier elements and revise the polarizations. If you are going for a suprise ending, or some kind of switch that will take the reader off guart, you need to start leading them frim the very first word. These don’t just happen on accident, and they don’t just work out; a poem needs to be under a tight grip the whole time to deliver a satisfying ending.
**Again, I am going in as close to numerical order as possible. Please check back later for poem 19 and 20, they will be part of a later set.