Poem 34 – Editing for Final

I love this poem. It has been a cornerstone of most of my recent submissions, from the MFA application to a chapbook competition, I think the lofty haze it offers the reader is a strong demonstration of my work.

aPoem 34

Things I love about this poem

How short it is

The language

The imagery

The haze

The dream-like state


Things that still might need some love

The half filled cup thing

The library, should I come out and say it?

The title, is it awesome?

The dreamers, should I show them more?


Nonetheless, I will be trying to get this poem published until I die… or someone takes it. I love the flow, the haze, the simplicity, the readibility. For now I will call this finished and let that be it.




Even when poems are near or mostly finished, there is still room for improvement. Keep in mind the things you love and are unsure of in the pieces you consider finished in case you ever want to crack them open again. There are lots and lots of ways and opportunities to edit, even the poems we deem done.


Poem 34 FinalPoem 34 Original – Poem 34 Postcard

Poem 34 Final



Toes in the Water


We play hide and seek in seats

We share with strangers.

With you hiding and me

Lost. Sought truth but

Found only book bindings.

The well is depthless where

The well informed tread water

In the wake of inspiration:

A filling cup twice its necessity.

Come find me where pages

Smell of fingertips and

Day dreamers drape drowsy

Heaped on borrowed furniture.


Poem 34 EditedPoem 34 Original