I remember when you were born & now I remember when you had died. for MB, who may infact still be gliding in.
With much love,
–ECW
Tag: Final
Poem 34 – Editing for Final
I love this poem. It has been a cornerstone of most of my recent submissions, from the MFA application to a chapbook competition, I think the lofty haze it offers the reader is a strong demonstration of my work.
Things I love about this poem
How short it is
The language
The imagery
The haze
The dream-like state
Things that still might need some love
The half filled cup thing
The library, should I come out and say it?
The title, is it awesome?
The dreamers, should I show them more?
Nonetheless, I will be trying to get this poem published until I die… or someone takes it. I love the flow, the haze, the simplicity, the readibility. For now I will call this finished and let that be it.
TAKEAWAY
Even when poems are near or mostly finished, there is still room for improvement. Keep in mind the things you love and are unsure of in the pieces you consider finished in case you ever want to crack them open again. There are lots and lots of ways and opportunities to edit, even the poems we deem done.
Poem 34 Final
Toes in the Water
We play hide and seek in seats
We share with strangers.
With you hiding and me
Lost. Sought truth but
Found only book bindings.
The well is depthless where
The well informed tread water
In the wake of inspiration:
A filling cup twice its necessity.
Come find me where pages
Smell of fingertips and
Day dreamers drape drowsy
Heaped on borrowed furniture.
