Poem 53 Edited

Poem 53 was stuck, so I started over.

aPoem 53

Form and Function. Make sure your form is functional. Make sure the shape makes sense with the content, and the poem is the sum of your shape and content, and not just a wacky shape.

Be open minded but not absurd. That is sort of my new motto. I went through a phase of more adventurous writing but the effect was hard to change and evolve. When the form gets strange, I find, the poem is fixed in it’s first draft.

I am not very good at the form poetry that came into vogue a little time ago, taking control of the page and using space like design. Though I crave design, I find the poem suffers when I get too crazy about it. I think, for me, the writing falls into the space it recieves. Like social media spaces, like email spaces, like paper spaces. The poems I write on a compiter are longer, faster, and better thought out than the ones I write by hand because they are easier to get on the page and my handwriting doesn’t slow me down. (I never learned to hold a pencil quite right and my hand gets cramped quickly when I write by hand).

These poems, the crazy ones, are a result of less control and more experiment. I think, maybe, when the poem is final the shape shoudl be applied and then the idea can be cemented.

TAKEAWAY

I basically had to start over, not because the poem was bad but because it was stuck. I think maybe some will come back, but for now the new content will serve as a jumping board for a better poem in general. For me, the shape is sometimes a limiting element, and in later drafts I will try to resist shape until the end.

Poem 53 RevisedPoem 53 Original

 

Poem 69 Editing

There is one question I will be answering for the rest of my life. What’s a poem?

I don’t know…

This one’s a poem, I think. If I say it is then it is. Or at least that is the contemporary consensus. And of course who can argue with a poet in a time so free and open to art.

This is a poem because I say it is, but also because it reads like a poem, because it deals with poetic imagery and delves into a deeper meaning in a few lines. Prose do that to, but in prose there would potentially be more, a different tone, or just plain more to work with.

In the end the lines are blurry so enjoy the freedom poets.

TAKEAWAY

Write what you feel. Let the openness of poetry be your gateway. Experiment. Enjoy. That’s all I have to say about this one. I’m not too enamoured with the revised version so there will be more critique on this one certainly.

Poem 69 RevisedPoem 69 Original

Poem 7 Edited

Fun With Forms

Form poems have been around as long as poetry, in fact poetry would have hardly been considered an art without adhering to strict rules and guidelines for meter and rhyme… as poems took on the structure of conversation, and each following generation pulled farther and farther from the preceding norm, forms became an identity a poem could showcase rather than a requirement.

With that said, there are hundreds of variations of forms that you could try with your work. I will get into these more thoroughly as I revise sonnets and villanelles from my own collection. For now I will address the issue with all forms as they pertain to the editing process.

Writing a form poem is easy: just follow the directions.
Writing a good form poem is hard: make the directions more meaningful with your content.
Editing a form poem is grueling: with the limitations of a form imposed on a poem, it can be hard to see where changes could occur and even more difficult to enact those changes without compromising the structure.

When you come across a poem that you feel needs revising but are worried about breaking the pattern you can follow my quick guide to revisions:

1. Do all of the words work?
Fixing iffy words is like repainting a house, it freshens everything up and makes the message more meaningful. This can happen at any stage of the poem and should always be a part of your editing…

2. What are you saying?
Form poems can be tricky because the poem might end before the profound truth is revealed. Remember that poems are more than witty compilations of words, and that even in a poem with structure the message must bring something new to light… or else why are you writing?

3. Should this be a form poem?
After a few read through’s with fresh eyes, it will be clear whether this poem is enhanced by the form or if the poem depends on the form to be considered a complete piece… if you find yourself leaning on the poem’s structure, your poem needs some serious remodeling…

For this particular piece, which has seen its fair share of editing in poetry classes during my undergrad, question three is my main concern. I can spruce up the words, I can add more umph, but there are still some areas that need work. For example, the mother-daughter lines in the first stanza are a little bland… I wonder if they are just filling in the form or of there is something more there.

TAKEAWAY

Forms are a fun way to challenge your poetry and expand your ability to control language. They can also be a sore spot in your collection if you don’t give them proper editing. With the three steps I have for editing poems, and maybe some of your own, you will be able to successfully tackle your more structured work without turning a blind eye to the form’s shortcomings. Who knows that Keats or Shakespeare might have written had they been allowed to open their structure. Who’s to say what Whitman or Pound or H.D. might have penned had they been forced to work with structure instead of poetic philosophies. As a Millennial writer you have the best of both words, so write and edit to the peak of your abilities, knowing that there are no walls around your work but the ones you create for yourself.

 

Poem 7 RevisedPoem 7 Original